Somewhere, in one of the internet graveyards lies a private post I wrote on MySpace after not getting drafted on to a home team.
My derby career has not been filled with glory.
I started skating in March 2007 when I heard there was a DC league being formed. I started going to open skate at the roller rink 30 minutes away. After about a month, I bought skates. July 5th, I started showing up at DC’s meat practice in a parking garage. It was an open, once a week thing. If you had the gear, you could skate.
A few months in, I failed my first assessment. I was totally confident that I could easily pass-I was SORELY mistaken. I hated not passing-but, I came back and kept skating.
I started taking skate lessons at 8am on Saturday mornings. I could get a good 3-4 hours of skating in at the nearly empty rink. I still went to open skate once or twice a week to keep skating.
Next time, I passed my assessment. I was in “Step 2.” I started skating with the league at their practices. I went to all of their scrimmage practices. I helped keep score, I would sit upstairs and watch derby. I volunteered at bouts, I went to the after parties.
April 2008-It was time to take my full WFTDA Assessment and make it on the league. And, I did it. I made it! Next was the draft. I pictured all of the team captains getting together in smokey room, hashing over who gets who.
Driving home with a friend from practice—she got the call. She was drafted to one of the home teams. I kept my phone with me, I obsessively checked the message board—seeing who got drafted where. Emails were flying the next morning—who got put where. My phone still hadn’t rung. One of my fellow meats posted the results (shared with her by her new team). I was not on any list.
Finally, I did get a call. I hadn’t been drafted. I was told that I was totally a “rollergirl” just not drafted this time. Keep working hard…I would make it eventually. This was the hardest thing.
This was being flat out told I was not good enough. That, even though some teams had room—I was SUCH A LIABILITY that I was just a waste of space on skates. I had no redeeming value as a skater.
Then, I kept showing up for practices. I scrimmaged when a team invited me to. I showed up for events, I volunteered to flier. I cheered on my friends as they skated in their first bouts. A new batch of meat came through, passed their assessments and it was time for a new draft.
July 2008-I was drafted on to a home team. I had finally made it.
I spent my first team practice in tears-it was hard-I felt like I was holding everyone back. I felt like I was a waste of space on skates and they wasted their draft pick on me.
But, I kept skating. I showed up to practice, scrimmage and bouted. The last bout of my first season, I had friends FLY IN to see me skate. I skated in one jam-my team still lost the championship. I was so humiliated. But, I kept showing up, kept skating, falling in even deeper love with derby.
I spent 3 seasons on my first home team. I have served on the Board and as Co-Chair on a committee. At the end of my first season, I was elected co-captain. I was asked to coach the Travel Team-which I have done for a full season, now. I am a competent and confident league trainer. I am now co-captaining the new DCRG 4th Team- The Majority Whips.
This is my personal roller derby story. There has been a lot of disapointment. But, I still love roller derby-and I just really want to skate.
I am a member of the DC Rollergirls.
